the-unpopular-opinions:

(Sorry this post is so long D:)

I am really sick of being groped without my consent all the time, and I think sexual battery should be taken more seriously.  If you just randomly go up to someone and touch them inappropriately without their consent, then you’re disgusting and deserve a good punch in the face.

Okay, I think I’d best start from the beginning with this. So, as far back as I can remember, my parents have loved to smack my butt or squeeze one of my butt cheeks. They did it about once a week when I was younger, but now I can hide myself in my room so it’s only once a month each. I think they just see it as a joke or whatever, although I do note that they never do it in public so maybe they do know it’s wrong on some level. Now they’re great parents in all other respects, and I still love them. They’ve spent tones of money on me; they’re even willing to pay all of my university fees. But I really wish they didn’t do it. I’ve begged, pleaded, but they just laugh and tell me to stop overreacting or they promise they won’t and then two days later they do it again. I hate how it makes me feel. When they do it I just feel like my feelings don’t matter to them, I feel like I’ve lost all control, and I feel really really dirty. It makes me curse the body parts I have that have been violated. Nowadays I always get dead nervous if anyone stands behind me. Not only that, but I completely flip out if anyone in public gropes me, because it reminds me off all the previous times. I hate how everyone can witness me being so helpless and embarrassed. I hate how sometimes, when I try sleep, I can’t and all the times it’s happened replay in my head. And yes, it probably is pathetic to get this nervy about someone only touching me, and no, you don’t have to tell me that at least I’m not starving in Africa for the millionth time. Look, maybe it is pathetic, but I can’t help how I feel. I can’t help that it makes me feel that way. And I don’t deserve to feel this way.

Now, if it can get me that wound up, and I’ve only been touched, can you imagine what it must be like for an actual victim of rape when someone gropes them without their consent!? When they have to re-live being nothing but someone’s sexual pleasure again.It makes me shudder just thinking. So if someone touches you, then you should always be able to tell someone, and have them punished. And don’t say you always can, because you CAN’T.

So there was one guy in my old school, creep loved to touch me. At first he just said stuff, like “I want to cum on your tits.” Or “Baby ride me like you ride your horses.” Which I shrugged off, I could deal with it. Stuff like that was said to me every day, it was just a part of the whole school equation. Anyway, then one time he got a towel and whipped my ass with it, what’s more it hurt. I told a teacher, and I told her the stuff he said before, and they just went over and said “Hey don’t whip people okay?” As if that would fucking stop him. In fact, it made him worse. He should’ve gotten at least a week’s worth of detention and a phone call home.  Instead he started laughing about how what he did had me uncomfortable. Then two days later in the hall he grabbed my breast, clearly enjoying himself at my expense and fear. I was trapped with all this, if I told a teacher again the same shit would happen, he’d be able to laugh at me even more. So I let it go. Anyway, he stopped a while after that.  But about six months later, he started mucking around with me and a friend as we were leaving the school building. He kept putting his arm around her, fluttering his eyes and saying “Hey babe, wanna go out with me?” Even though she asked him to stop. I looked at those eyes and I had this strong urge to claw them out of his skull. But I fought it down and politely asked “Please can you leave her alone?” But he wordlessly responded by going behind me and squeezing my left butt cheek. Well, I truly snapped at that point, like the rage boiling in my stomach was pouring out of me. How dare he? How dare a scumbag who didn’t even know what an atom was in science class touch me that way? I needed to be in control again. So, I turned round and tried to whack him with my school bag. He used his arm to block his face, which just enraged me even more. If I had to take what he did, and if he just caved in to his urges, then he would suffer at that hands of my urges. I rammed him up against the wall, just ramming my shoulder against him and the wall again and again. I loved how afraid he looked, it just drove me further and further. I deserved the pleasure it gave me. Then I started to claw at his face, I wanted to get at his eyes. A teacher ripped me off at that point, and as you can expect I got in bucket loads of trouble for this. The teacher ranted in my face for about ten minutes that no matter what he did I should’ve just told someone. Even though I already tried that, and I was provoked. I tried to explain but she wouldn’t hear of it. Sure I deserved punishment, quite a lot of it too. But so did he. I’m sorry, but he deserved way more that what I had done, because I wasn’t the only one who suffered because of him.  Anyway, after that I broke down in tears with my friends on the way home. I was just so tired of going to a school in which every day boys made rude comments about my body, and a school where I had to be paranoid that I would be touched. I already had that at home; I couldn’t cope with it at school too. The funny thing is, afterwards the guy was terrified of me. He never touched anyone again, or at least whilst I was at that school. So violence solved the problem.

I have other examples too. A guy on my bus kept fiddling with my bra strap. I asked again and again for him to stop, and he just kept doing it. Everyone was surprised at how angry I got, and later when I demanded he apologise he just said “C’mon, you know you enjoyed it.” And here’s another, a guy in my gym class. First he touched my thigh. I pushed his hand away and politely told him that I didn’t like it, but of course he didn’t listen. He then went on and touched my breasts twice, my butt once, and he’s done even worse stuff to my friend too. Every time I’ve fought the urge to hurt him, apart from the second time he touched my breast, then I cut his hand with my nails. I hate this. I hate fighting against my rage all the time. Because I’m learning how to hurt people in order to solve problems, and I’m risking seriously getting in trouble. I might ruin my life because of these idiots who keep touching me make me so angry.

So yeah, I know so far this has been me simply telling events from my perspective. But it’s to try and get across how horrible being groped without consent can be. Obviously it’s no-where near as much of a problem as rape but it still needs to be addressed. That’s why:

1. It needs to be taken seriously, even if it’s just a one-time occurrence, the person who violated you should be made to regret their decision by whoever is in charge.  Especially in schools, which are places with a lot of teens that are struggling, who don’t need the fear of being touched piled on top of everything else.
2. If the reason you attacked someone is that they constantly violated you regardless of you asking them to stop, then you should not be as severely punished as if you attacked them for no reason.

songsinbarefeet:

chawsaoz:

‎”THROUGH A RAPIST’S EYES” (PLS TAKE TIME TO READ THIS. it may save a life.) Reblog this!

  
It seems that alot of attackers use some tactic to get away with violence. Not many people know how to take care of themselves when faced with such a
situation. Everyone should read this especially each n every girl in this world. THOUGHT THIS WAS GOOD INFO TO PASS ALONG…

FYI - Through a rapist’s eyes! A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:



1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle.
They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid, or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.

3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.

4] The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is grocery store parking lots.

5] Number two is office parking lots/garages.

6] Number three is public restrooms.

7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.

8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.

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POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:


1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk:
can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.

 
2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would 
not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

4] If someone grabs you, you can’t beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and
armpit or in the upper inner thigh - HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.

5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our
instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.

6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using
much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel
little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.

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FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ….

I know you are smart enough to know these pointers but there will be some, where you will go “hmm I must remember that” After reading forward it to someone you care about, never hurts to be careful in this crazy world we live in.


1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.

2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : if a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you…. chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or
purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping,eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON’T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side,put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS , LEAVE.
 

5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:
a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be
hiding at the passenger side , peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. ( DO THIS TOO BEFORE RIDING A TAXI CAB) .
b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)
 

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
  

Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it’s better safe than sorry.

DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT NOT REBLOGGING THIS! IT COULD ACTUALLY SAVE A LIFE.

Reblog this. Only the picture will appear on your blog.

Will never not reblog this. Saving this forever. There were so many things on here that are incredibly useful. It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t match your theme!! Is that worth not saving someone’s life?? This is amazing.